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ep2

by døves

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1.
døves: couple bars inside my pocket "how come døves never drops shit?" back of the club feeling nauseous anxiety mixed with exhaustion i was envisioning black lipstick framed empty promises like you're on some slaughter shit catch a body to hit a lick and i can't recognize your face in a crowd anymore i've been seeing floors, six stories and i'm yours i haven't seen straight in seven days caught up in a darker kind of way, i'm just wasting wicca phase: i had love once, i tried to escape it you don't know what's real though, i know how to fake shit i knew how to make my heart keep breaking caught up in a dark way, left my ego broken you knew how to keep things left unspoken you put me in bad ways, i was all emotion i wish i could sleep my vice to the ocean you're on some evil shit, use your body to kill me quick døves: i wish i could sleep my vice to the ocean i wish i could slit my throat wide open i wish you would keep things left unspoken i'm in the back with the clique in all black and a hundred milligrams of shit and i can't feel my fucking face hope i don't die this way, switchblade always on my waist six days and i rot away crimson wrist and my skin all grey like you're on some evil shit, why can't you kill me quick you see me suffering, you see me drown in it swear i'm just dying slow, but at least i can't feel it
2.
horse head: how could i ever get used to missing that and if you give it up, you can't take it back drugs have been keeping me up at night under club lights, i'm such a mess tonight i couldn't wait to be back home one more show then i can be alone i feel so bad when she sings my songs she sounds so alone, like she's used to that she feels so bad, the way i sing my songs i feel so alone and i'm used to that i'm used to that, i want it back i'm true to it, go through with this i'm moving back to where i'm from i had you in nothing but black then now i only speak of you in past tense thought i had it, i couldn't grasp it now it's slipping away into blackness døves: i'm used to that, i'm using that i want you bad, i want the black and you want to see me in past tense i had you in nothing but black then and i was in the party, you were at the gate and i could call you in and we could slip away and maybe we could talk if i could stay awake but i just took a clip and i'm fading away you can't help, you're too late (time spent painted in white) recalling all the words you said like i could ever fall for that (eyes mint, amber and blind) i was just a fuck you had like you would ever love me back visions keep me up at night, poison warms the cold inside like my life through your eyes
3.
wicca phase: tie it up, would that be wrong must be the heat that makes my throat hurt in the morning i've been waking up hot in my own bed and you always turn your back, but i don't even want to talk about it like it's your new way to attack show you i have it i pay everything in cash you tie me up so i'll react i've been calling out to you but i'm getting no response and i'm like if there's a crisis, it'll be the last one and if i die i hope it's in front of a mirror i've got a girl but it's super so platonic i've got a friend but it's really not convincing it calls me up and i will say that you were not that down bodies on the ground, lights really out bodies on the ground døves: i was in the trees then, living in the background couldn't even see then, yeah i had the blade out digging into my skin, searching for an answer i think i wanted your love, i'm taking my chances like do i want to die today or run away excuses that i made sound the same, like i said i'm sorry don't want me to leave, but i think it's too late you don't want me to leave gothboiclique in the club in the back with the drugs in a bag and my heart in my hands, so black i've been buying bottles all night i'm so blacked benzo in my blood like i think i need that and yeah i want to die but i don't want to forget you so tell me what it's like when i miss you and tell me what it's like when i'm with you i still want to die but i don't want to forget you
4.
jpdreamthug: there's a solace in your eyes and it draws me in a special reason brought to light i had to see again i can't be with you now the questions that you didn't ask are running through my head it makes me wonder what you'd have said if i had asked again i guess there are reasons that i think you should go nothing at all i don't feel at all i'm not home døves: so i'm just the medicine you take when you're sick well i'ma put a thousand on my wrist just to cover up the scars that you left me with shine a little light on all the dark that you left me in i'm in echo park park having visions with the clique yeah i've been driving cars with the figures in the sixes and if you knew my name then, would you really call me it? i think i'm mackned, i think i'm passionate like i'm so down to rip your heart out and you just lie in wait with your arms out all those scars across my back i know you think about i got medicine in hand, just let me pass out i think there's a passion, i think there's a solace i don't think i'll find it, i'll just feel nothing you still feel the marks on the back of your neck red wine on that drive to the hill where you lived i could find a solace in your sweat, i could drown in bottles in your bed and you could feed me percocets, waste away in all of it like we're already dead
5.
rory 03:20
pick me up and flip the car i just want to die in your arms we don't fuck with bottles at the bar percocets & xanax on my card and i'm in LBC with coldhart GBC in east LA, come run up i'm in los angeles broken neck heavy head cigarettes silhouettes shivering hold it in half breaths my eyes are red from all of this and i think this is it leg over the ledge we shared smoke you shared the words behind your lips and i was alone i wasn't anything at all you're just tall bones with your soft skin against my neck and the tears on it and the words that i left you with were my own but my hands shake and my legs break i swear that you don't ache like i ache i swear that you can't hate like i hate i know there's passion in the pain i can't relate envelop my scars like you broke down and held me while i'm feigning addiction, all this time out in LA like i swear that i'm trying and i swear that you're helping and i swear i'm a good man
6.
youth 03:20
i’m holding my head, i can’t hold your hand i already said i wasn’t meant for this troubled by the emptiness & benzodiazepines this is fucking atrophy, i feel it i can’t feel shit, bourbon on my rings i’m collecting names, setting fire to my insides put that blade against my tongue, you know i fuck with death i’ve been pulling powder in my lungs like i’ve got nothing left angel wings on me, i’m already dead halos buried with their hymns six feet from my fucking head and i was in the back during the set dressed in black, i didn’t get your text maybe i left you on read (maybe you don’t understand me) i’m under stress, under slept, i feel the noose around my neck i feel like i don’t want to live, i feel like i’ve already bled out cut open, sun poisoned eyeliner, your rhetoric a vision, mirages i’m hollow, nothing at all you’re poured up, new haircut (already dead in the benz hit a hundred and five) no feeling, young and in love (eighteen forever got blades out i’m ready to die) eyeliner, your parties (headlights in my eyes, the darkness eats me up inside) scar tissue, your skin on mine

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produced by døves (soundcloud.com/dovescry)
art by reyn yeager (reynyeager.com)

#gothboiclique

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released January 25, 2017

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døves Los Angeles, California

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